Coming to Terms With the Election Results
It’s hard to believe it’s been two weeks since the election. The days have just flashed by me while I absorbed information and reactions to the outcome like a sponge. I wanted to write immediately but held back while observing things, evolving my thoughts and emotions, and redirecting my energies to other productive actions. Also, like many, I needed to rest after this election cycle.
Now that the reality has set in more for myself, and an actionable direction is being laid out, I feel better equipped to write about it. With so much happening, I have written a lot. I removed several pages worth of writing to post separately because there was so much to say. So even though this is long, it’s not as long as it was going to be.
This editorial will cover the reactions to the election, the stages of grief people are experiencing, and forging a way forward. Fair warning: I will be blunt and to the point sometimes, but it comes from a place of community care and love. I empathize with the people who are still grieving after they expected a different outcome, and I carry space for them, but I am past the emotional stage and working on taking whatever the next steps are. (Or I am just disassociating very well. It’s hard to tell these days).
This piece will otherwise be me writing in my usual storyteller mode. And if you like my long pieces, please buy me a coffee to support my work so I can keep writing and running the magazine. :’)
I don’t know what the future holds, or what’s around the corner. But I do know that the paths we forge now will determine what the destination looks like. I am forging ahead with love, compassion, and community care. Walk with me a bit.
Reactions to the Election
The Fears
For many, the reality and upheaval of the results are still setting in. Half of the country is celebrating or outright gloating; the other half is in crisis mode, preparing for the worst and whatever is to come.
It’s a sad and scary time right now for many as people deal with their despair and grief about things. Most people are terrified about their rights and their neighbor’s rights being stripped. The rest ignore reality to avoid their emotions, don’t care about politics, or fail to understand what’s coming.
I’ve seen discussions about learning self-defense, acquiring weapons to protect oneself, what countries to flee to, and what resources to stock up on. Some people are suggesting setting up underground railroads to move pregnant people and members of the LGBTQ+ community out of dangerous states. Women are talking about getting sterilized. People were sharing suicide hotline and mental health crisis hotline numbers. The list goes on, but one thing is sure: people are terrified. This isn’t going to be like 2016 again. It’s going to be much worse.
I have my fears, too. As a woman, I worry about whether my right to vote will be taken away, if birth control is going to be banned, and my overall bodily autonomy. I worry about what other rights women previously fought for that I will lose. Will I not be allowed to have a bank account anymore or have the right to own property? My mother is disabled and going through cancer treatment. I fear many things might impact her health care or other factors in her life.
As a human being, I worry that the people I love and those in my community will be persecuted for many things. I worry about the unhoused people who will be rounded up for prison slave labor, the immigrants who will be deported, and the LGBTQ+ people who will be in danger from several fronts. I fear the loss of clean air, water, and other environmental or public health regulations we will lose. I worry about the children who will lose their education, the disabled people who will lose protections, and the single or widowed moms who will be at risk of losing their children simply because there’s no father in the house. (If you haven’t read about Project 2025, these are things conservatives will work towards under Trump, along with eliminating the Department of Education).
These are just a few things coming, but there are also inconceivable things we face that we don’t even foresee yet. It’s like looking into a dark, foreboding pit as we’re being pushed closer to it. It’s a hole that’s been dug for a long time. We don’t know how bottomless the pit is nor what’s waiting for us at the bottom.
Seeing everyone’s despair and the direction we are heading is terrifying and heartbreaking on a deep level. This country is ill and in pain. We are lost and scared, grieving our humanity and other losses to come, and uncertain of how to prepare. Overall, I worry about the future of our country and the world. Whatever happens, I know we will never be the same. I can only hope that turns out to be of benefit to us. When you hit rock bottom, the only way up and out is by pushing through.
That’s a scary thought, I know. The fear is palpable and overwhelming. And that fear is not unfounded. Sit with it as needed, and then get ready to fight back.
Increased Racism and Misogyny
Before the election, hard-core Trump voters were threatening violence. Some expressed glee at the idea of hunting their neighbors down in a second insurrection if Trump lost again. Having won, those violent tendencies have now been emboldened and redirected into doubling down on violent racism, misogyny, and other forms of hate.
The moment it was called, the worst of the worst immediately took the opportunity to solidify their beliefs and harass the people they felt superior to.
Recent Amped Up Racist Acts
Black Americans woke up the day after the election to random people texting them disturbing and racist messages. These texts, which sometimes had people’s names and addresses, said some variation of, “You have been selected to pick cotton at the nearest plantation. Our slave catchers will be picking you up.”
Many of the recipients were children. While the FBI is investigating the incident, which transpired across multiple states, Montgomery County Public Schools said in a statement that law enforcement “consider the messages low-level threats.” If the police view these as “low-level threats,” it’s a look at how they’ll respond to incidences of hate going forward. (The police were founded on racism and were never there to protect or help people anyway, so it’s unsurprising that this is their response to blatant racism. It’s their job to protect property and power, not people.)
Online, I’ve also seen reports of Latino people being harassed and told they’re going to be deported. And it’s not just conservatives. I’ve watched people who call themselves progressives or allies tell Palestinians and other Arab people that they “deserve” to be genocided because Harris lost. The racism is stemming from all sides.
Your political affiliation doesn’t prevent you from having racist or bigoted ideals and behaviors. You’re in the wrong place if you’re not ready for that conversation.
Misogynstics Coming Out in Full Force
After the election, women started being told, “Your body, MY choice,” by random men, both online and in person. Parents reported that their young children heard the same thing from male peers at school.
This transpired after white supremacist/neo-Nazi Nick Fuentes posted a video gleefully saying, “Your body, MY choice,” among other vile things. He cackles with delight while saying women have no rights and that their bodies are property to be owned. Women are also being told to “get back in the kitchen” and even receiving threats of rape by men online.
After women responded with posts and memes about how they’d respond to men saying something like this to their faces, men got upset. Like Fuentes, after he got doxxed and had to go hide at his mom’s house, they claimed they were “just joking.”
Men. I need you to understand that when you or other men say that, that is not a joke – that is a threat.
And even if you are a man who wouldn’t say this, if any other men around you do, it’s then your responsibility, as a man, and as a human being, to shut that shit down immediately. Make them understand that’s inappropriate and unacceptable behavior. Tell them that’s a fucking weird thing to say.
Normalizing this shit and not checking people is part of how things got to this point. It’s time to hold people accountable for their words and actions. If you are not holding your bros accountable, you’re not an “ally” or a “feminist” or anything other than an enabler.
Men saying things like “Your body, my choice” to a woman, or anyone for that matter, should not be surprised when they get punched in the face or worse. No one is going to feel sorry for their FAFO after “joking” about sexual assault. And men shouldn’t be surprised when their partners leave them for saying or excusing that kind of shit.
Nor should anyone be surprised when the other fucked up shit they say causes them to lose friends and family. It’s not rocket science to comprehend that when you say bigoted shit, people aren’t going to want to be around you.
You are not a safe person if you believe or even “jokinlgy” say these kinds of things.
We’re not making excuses for people’s unacceptable behavior anymore. Your freedom of speech isn’t free of consequences. No one owes you a relationship, let alone access to them or the space to cause them harm.
(P.S. – THIS IS WHY WOMEN CHOOSE THE BEAR)
Stages of Grief
Lastly, regarding reactions to the election, people are grieving the election results at all stages of the process.
Denial
Even two weeks in, some are still in the first stage, denial. They’re rejecting the idea that Harris did anything wrong in her campaign to warrant a loss at such a large margin. Others are buying into conspiracy theories that the election was stolen.
As much election interference as Elon Musk objectively did, the conspiracy about the Starlink satellites switching the votes in voting machines was debunked. I will say that it really says something about the state of things that it was believable to a degree. When I first heard it, it sounded plausible. However, voting machines are not connected to the internet.
For the people still in the denial stage, please work on moving to the next steps for your own sake and well-being. We spent the last four years wondering how conservatives could believe the election was stolen and kept denying the results still to this day. This is how. People get stuck in their grief about things. And let’s also be honest – if the election was stolen, do you expect anything to be done about it? We barely did anything about the insurrection. Your energy is better directed towards preparing for what’s next.
Anger
With the next stage, anger, I want people to know that their anger is valid. It’s inherently enraging that so many people chose their desire for comfort over the lives of others. Or that they willingly chose hate to lead. I also feel that most people who got to this stage burned through it relatively fast. Two weeks in, people seem to have moved on to other steps in the grief process.
Their anger manifested like a hot knife cutting cords. People were immediately setting boundaries with people in their lives who had voted against human rights. Conservatives started posting in droves about how they were blocked, uninvited to family get-togethers or holiday dinners, and, in some cases, had spouses file for divorce. The people who were cut out of their family’s lives respond by speaking of tolerance and civility as if voting against people’s rights and autonomy is tolerant or civil. They are in the Find Out stage of Fucking Around.
To be blunt, if someone still doesn’t understand by now why their marginalized friends or family are scared and angry and cutting people off, I don’t know what else there is to say, aside from you are not a safe person to be around. And it’s your responsibility to reflect on that. You’ve had plenty of time to catch up to reality. I judge no one who feels the need to set these boundaries with family and friends to protect themselves post-election.
And honestly, if you fall into this camp of not understanding why, I don’t know why you’re even here reading this. Unless you’re ready to do the work yourself to understand, have humility about the harm you’ve caused others, and work to make things right, you’re in the wrong place. If you are ready, I tentatively welcome you to standing on the right side of history, but understand that the invite is easily rescinded if you’re not actually here to do that hard, uncomfortable work. Don’t be surprised if you are turned away from the spaces you voted against existing in the first place. And don’t expect forgiveness, even if you develop enough humility to apologize this late. You’re an adult. Act like it. No one is going to coddle you or spoon-feed you empathy, nor should they.
Bargaining
It seems that many people are still in the bargaining stage. They struggle to find the meaning to all this and share stories to work through their disbelief and grief. “But the crowds were so big, the energy was so strong, she was so charismatic.”
People are learning that even in those situations, they are in a bubble, an echo chamber, even if well-meaning. Surrounded by like-minded, affirming people, feeling safe and sure about the future comes easily. I remember that feeling in 2020 with Bernie before the Democratic party knee-capped him and the ‘Not Me, Us’ movement he’d grown.
That disconnect has left people still bargaining for answers to why Harris lost and how Trump won by such a wide margin. Most of them, voters and politicians alike, are pointing fingers instead of looking inward at the campaign’s choices throughout the election cycle.
The blame seems to be primarily placed on anti-genocide voters and other third-party voters, ignoring how even if the 2.5M third-party voters had instead voted for Harris (and let’s be honest – most RFK Jr. voters were not going to vote for her anyway), it wouldn’t have been enough to have even won her the popular vote, let alone the electoral college.
People are also blaming different marginalized groups for her loss, saying that Black, Latino, and Arab voters didn’t show up for her. I’d argue that Biden, Harris, and others continually neglect to show up for them and instead continuously harm their communities. The Democrats got complacent and expected people to fall in line. They are responsible for their failings in this campaign and their lack of action to protect working-class people and marginalized groups in past years. They have no one to blame but themselves.
Bargaining about who’s at fault doesn’t change the result, especially without addressing the party’s failings. The election is over, and aside from the need to take whatever needs to be learned from this, I again urge people to continue through the final steps of their grief.
Depression
This is where I think the majority of people are currently. People feel anxious and overwhelmed, fearing all hope is lost and despairing about the future. All of these emotions are valid. Our future is uncertain. Whatever happens, it is going to be scary, and it’s going to be rough. Our survival is at stake.
But don’t let them steal the future from you or the joy in the small, human moments we will still have. And don’t give in before anything has happened, and don’t obey in advance. The future is unwritten. This isn’t over. And we are not going down without a fight. We will weather whatever’s coming together.
If you are struggling with this stage of grief and are feeling fear, anxiety, despair, or overwhelmed with any other heavy emotions, please take a moment to breathe deep and center yourself.
Breathe in and welcome grounding, clarity, and hope, and breathe out the heaviness you feel, release the tension in your body and reject the feelings of helplessness or hopelessness. These heavy emotions may return later as the news cycle goes on, but for now, push them away. We need to have a clear head to plan ahead.
Breathing won’t make the situation disappear, but we must practice grounding and self-care now more than ever. We all are going to need it.
It’s not yet the end of the world. That is what the powers that be want you to feel so that you consent to the doom you feel. We cannot willingly allow them to destroy everything. Do not consent or obey in advance.
Acceptance
If you are at this final stage of grief like me, welcome. Personally, I felt I arrived here very quickly. I’ve always processed grief quickly. However, I was honestly unsurprised by Trump’s win, knowing the direction men were taking in the country with their increasing shift to the right and vocal desire to return to “traditional” values. I was more surprised about the margin of his win. The Democrats underestimated this demographic to a negligible degree, as they did with many other voting blocs.
After I voted on Tuesday morning, I did my best to stay off my phone until the next day. I didn’t want to get caught up in the refresh loops, constantly checking results. Whatever happened was out of our hands. I wanted to protect my mental health, enjoy my evening, and deal with the emotions the next day. Watching the news wasn’t going to change the results. No matter how the election went, I knew things wouldn’t improve. We were already well on our way into fascism; it didn’t just arrive overnight.
Right after I learned the results the following day, I sat with all the emotions I felt. To be transparent, I voted “None of the above” in this election. The genocide was my red line for my choice. Harris failed that litmus test again and again, and I was not going to sacrifice my morals to vote for a genocide-enabling, war-mongering cop with a history of harming different groups of people I stand in solidarity with. Be mad at me if you want about that – it doesn’t make a difference. Again, even if every third-party voter had voted for Harris, she still would have lost the popular vote and the Electoral College. I didn’t tell anyone how to vote or shame anyone for their choices. I opted out of doing political work this election cycle. I changed no one’s mind about their decisions. Me voting differently would have meant nothing.
I have no regrets about how I engaged with politics and voted in this election. I wonder if the people who willingly handed over their vote to Harris without a fight and without any meaningful demands regret theirs. This was an opportunity to hold her accountable and “push her left.” Instead, people excused her efforts at cozying up to the right, ultimately pushing more people away. It was sad to watch, but again, I wasn’t surprised that she lost. But I digress. That’s a topic for another day.
That said, my choice doesn’t mean I wanted Trump to win, and that doesn’t mean I wasn’t upset by the results. At the end of the day, more than half the country voted for all-out hate and harm. It hurt to see my country shift so far to the right. Even if I didn’t like Harris or vote for her, I empathized to a degree with people’s desire for their sense of safety and security. It’s human nature. People just wanted to ignore the issues that didn’t affect them personally while allowing things to continue deteriorating until 2028 and the next “most important election of our lives.”
From a psychological standpoint, I understand it, even if I strongly disagree with the motive. People don’t care, but I feel that that results from the systems wearing everyone down to the point where they don’t have the capacity (or sometimes the upbringing or education) to care. When you’re struggling to keep a roof over your family’s head and food on the table, you’re not going to have the time or energy to care about much else. If people’s needs were met, they’d care more. For the sake of my faith in humanity, I have to believe in that and not fall into a mindset of thinking most people are bad. People are products of their environment.
That said, I also understood that that sense of safety and security would be a farce if Harris won. The issues people faced wouldn’t disappear overnight just because a Black woman who upholds the police state and corporate special interests won the presidency. As I’ve seen many organizers iterate – representation doesn’t inherently equal progress. Authoritarianism, capitalism, and other systems will take the face of a woman, will be Black, gay, or trans, and everything under the sun if it furthers its goals. Harris and the DNC removed trans rights, universal health care, and the abolition of the death penalty off their platform, on top of committing genocide. The gender, race, ethnicity, orientation, etc., of a person or politician, means nothing inherently in terms of policy, progress, or protections.
I recognize that the outcome of Trump’s winning is not ideal. It’s terrifying. But now that the election has passed, I can only look at what’s next and what the big picture may look like. And I can only hope that maybe it will end up being the outcome needed to finally get people to feel the urgency of the threats we face collectively. People don’t change without the pressure to. It should never have gotten this bad or come to this, and it speaks about the state of our country and world that this is where we’re at. But here we are. So, where do we go from here?
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After the Election
In the days following the election, I waded through the reactions of others and cried a little, feeling their pain. I took a few days to rest and observe the fallout, taking note of everything I could. Then, I focused on what I could do that was impactful.
Maybe it’s because of the people I largely follow, but while despair was abundant, so was determination. As quickly as the worst came out after the news, the best of the best did, too. People immediately began working on the next steps. They’re sharing information across the board, directing people to resources, and encouraging people to use their energy for something constructive and productive.
So I accepted the outcome and thought, ‘Okay, what now?’ and began exploring options. One thing I knew was that I did not want nor need to reinvent the wheel regarding organizing. There are people in the community and country who’ve done this work for years, decades, and even generations. They have the experience, knowledge, and wisdom to deal with this and support people in these dark times ahead. We should be turning to them and supporting them and their work instead of trying to start from scratch. This means we have to do the hard work of supporting them and participating in these movements. To be clear, do not engage with or rely solely on others to address your needs. If you want support, you need to return that energy. It’s not about what you can receive or take from your community; it’s what you can give in return. What do you bring to the table?
And if we start from the ground up, it needs to be in terms of our lives and personal bubbles. You don’t need to start a whole grassroots movement by yourself or create a non-profit to resist fascism. Nor should you. You need to show up and do the work necessary. And you need to talk to the people closest to you. We are often more likely to inspire the people around us than complete strangers.
In my small realm of influence, I plan to invite close friends and colleagues to round tables where guest speakers from different groups will be invited and compensated for sharing their work and actionable items. I plan to encourage learning about things from organizing, history, and culture to community care, mutual aid, skill sharing, and more. I will pay the speakers out of my own pocket and encourage attendees to donate to those speakers’ groups to accommodate their time and energy.
With a new plan, I am preparing to face whatever challenges lie ahead of us. Other people’s fight is my fight. And I hope more people are ready to stand with their community and understand the concept of protecting each other.
The government isn’t going to save us. We save ourselves through community.
Looking Forward and Forging a Path Ahead
Surprising Wisdom from Bluey
The day after the election, I came home from an appointment and was met with some grounding advice from an unexpected source. My dog was watching Bluey, and I decided to watch the rest of the episode with her before turning it off. For those of you who know and watch Bluey with your kid, it was the ‘Copycat’ episode with the budgie that passed away where Bluey deals with grief.
At the end of the episode, Bluey sits with her mom, who says, “This isn’t how you wanted the game to go, is it?” Bluey responds, “No. But it’s okay; there’s nothing we can do about it. It’s out of our hands.”
And just like that, I was crying on the couch with my dog, who turned and looked at me right after Bluey said that and then gave me a kiss. Somehow, all of that together made me feel like everything would be okay. I was at peace with the reality we find ourselves in and ready to take the next step to respond with action.
This isn’t how many people wanted or expected the election to go. And there’s nothing we can do about changing the past. That is out of our hands and outside of our control. That’s okay. It will be okay. Because how we respond IS within our control. That part is in our hands.
Remember, the future is unwritten. It’s what we make of it. This isn’t over. Don’t give up before it starts.
Actionable Items
If you’re feeling lost and uncertain about what to do or how to start the next step, I hope the following suggestions are helpful. These are a collection of things I’ve seen shared from various organizers, people discussing things in groups, and from speaking to people within my own local community who’ve been organizing for years. If you’re ready to step into a realm of liberation and community care to fortify yourself in preparation for whatever is coming, take these first steps with me. I am in the same place. You are not alone.
Rest and Protect Your Mental Health
Priority number one right now is taking care of your mental health.
If the election cycle and the results were difficult for you, if you are despairing or otherwise struggling right now – REST.
Do not endlessly absorb the news. You will burn out fast. If you’re already glued to your screen about things and feeling anxious, you will not be able to handle what’s coming. They want you to wear out and give in before they even step foot in office. Caring about things is excruciatingly exhausting right now. Put your phone down. Unplug. REST.
Develop a good routine to have a sense of stability and control in your life. Schedule time for yourself to do something relaxing and soothing. Practice grounding yourself to mitigate the overwhelming feelings you’re experiencing and whatever is to come. When you feel overwhelmed, REST.
Remember, you cannot pour from an empty cup. We need you. Our communities need each of us.
REST.
Ask Questions – The Real, Tough Questions
When you feel rested and ready to take the next steps, a good place to start is by asking questions and going forward from there.
Ask yourself, what do you need or want to learn? Where can you learn to start doing the work of educating yourself, and where can you turn for guidance when needed? What books can you read to expand your worldview? What else can you learn that puts you outside of your comfort zone? What challenges you to see different perspectives? Are you ready for those challenges and different perspectives? Can you withstand cognitive dissonance when it appears? What practices are you developing to help you have a more open mind?
Make sure you’re also asking: What must you do to prepare yourself and your loved ones for what might affect you and them? Who around you needs support, and how can you provide support and hold space for people facing different threats to their health, safety, rights, and lives? And, how can you provide or protect spaces for people to ensure they continue to have space to be themselves, talk about what matters, and organize action? Are you ready to offer space to trans folks to talk about the threats to their community? Are you ready to sit with unhoused people or undocumented people to discuss what’s threatening them? Are you ready to attend meetings of other marginalized groups and be a barrier to those who want to harm them in these spaces? Holding space for others is crucial, whether it’s physical or emotional.
And ask yourself, what can I do for or contribute to my community? What skills or interests do I currently have or can learn that can be helpful? (You might be surprised to find that there are many different roles people can play in a movement – explore these options.) What issues are affecting my community, who is doing the work in my community, and how can I try to join and help further a common goal of addressing those issues?
Asking questions will lead to more questions, but it will also develop your sense of self and community care. It’s a long, rough road, but it’s worth it in the end and essential to our collective survival. We all must do the work of asking ourselves difficult, uncomfortable questions and objectively reflecting on who we are and who we want to become.
Start Talking With The People Around You and Building Community At Home
Sometimes, the biggest steps are the ones you take closest to home. Start by talking to the people around you who’ve also expressed concern about the state of things or interest in getting involved somehow.
Set up round tables or get-togethers with friends to discuss things like how to support yourselves and others. Identify both the similarities and differences in terms of what support looks like, what everyone is personally concerned about, and how to ensure everyone is cared for and receiving the support they need.
If you have similar actionable interests, set up a buddy system to work and learn together. Join a self-defense class together, help out at a meal prep/meal share, attend an organizing 101 class, read anti-racism books together, learn how to grow food together, volunteer to bring supplies to your unhoused neighbors, and attend school board meetings and city council sessions – even if you don’t have kids or are personally affected by proposed ordinances. For example, you might not currently be homeless, so you might not care about a local anti-homelessness law being passed. But if you ever became homeless, wouldn’t you want people to speak up for you and defend your rights and try to stop a bill that criminalizes homelessness? Don’t wait until you’re personally affected by things to give a shit.
These are just a few things to get your foot in the door. I’ve learned that once you start looking for things to learn about and become involved with, it opens even more doors to growing your sense of community care. And if you’re new to community building, you must start somewhere. Even if it seems small, it makes a difference and prepares you for heavier and more complex challenges ahead. Community care is like resistance training. It’s a muscle you have to grow. Everything you do, you get better at. You don’t have to do everything, but you have to do something.
Look To The Helpers and Organizers In Your Community and Step Outside Your Circles, Echo Chambers, and Comfort Zones
When getting involved, look for the people already doing the work, particularly the ones who’ve been doing this for a long time. They have the knowledge and experience to guide us. Just make sure you are listening and learning and not talking over the people offering that guidance. You are a guest in their space. Don’t derail a movement because things aren’t what they seem or you’re uncomfortable.
Make sure you are practicing humility, are open to sitting with the discomfort of leaning, are checking your privileges at the door, and that you are not doing this for attention or clout. This is not the time to expect gold stars or likes on posts just because you showed up to volunteer somewhere. No one will coddle people for needing attention out of this or doing it for selfish reasons. It’s not about you.
The path ahead is not for individual motivations but collective ones. If you are still willing to sacrifice others for personal comfort, you’re in the wrong space. You’re not ready for what’s coming. We are not free until everyone is free.
Learn Everything You Can
I have been studying history, learning about organizing, and practicing better community care for years. I am still learning. I will always be learning, just like how I’ll continually be growing as a person until I die.
The point of that is to illustrate this: don’t ever think you’re done learning, that you’ve learned “enough,” or that what you have learned is the end all be all of knowledge. There is ALWAYS more to learn and change about our understanding of the world because the world is constantly changing and growing too.
You don’t need to become an expert at anything. Instead, aim to continuously add to your personal wealth of knowledge. It has the capacity for exponential growth if you allow it.
Whether it’s anti-racism, history, self-defense, gardening, sewing, first aid, mutual aid, or anything else, there’s always something to learn and more to learn about it.
One can’t learn everything. But everyone can learn something and then share it with others. You never know what knowledge you possess that will be helpful to your community. And with the threat of the truth being silenced and outright banned or our history being erased and rewritten, it’s more important than ever to learn and preserve that knowledge. So learn all you can, while you can, and help keep objective truth alive.
Be Fucking Silly and Be Your Fucking Self
Lastly, this one is from me. If there’s one thing I’ve learned over the past several years, it’s that the silliness keeps the horrors at bay. From comedy shows and kids’ movies to dressing up, swinging on a swing at the park, and connecting with your inner child, be fucking silly and be your beautiful, silly self. Finger paint. Read a children’s book. Sing out loud. Cosplay as your favorite character. Climb a tree. Do whatever makes you happy and brings light and joy in the darkness. The little moments of joy will keep us going.
And be your true self, whoever you are. Just like how it takes people years to not give a fuck what other people think about them, it took humanity ages to get to where it is now, where more people than ever can express themselves more openly and unapologetically.
Don’t give that up. Don’t willingly allow them to take that from us. Don’t give yourself up to the people and systems that want everything to be dull and homogeneous and gray and drab for a fake sense of what’s “proper.” Don’t let people force you back into a box or tell you how to dress, act, or what you’re allowed to like or do. Don’t let others control how you express yourself or your truth.
That said, I know a lot of people are scared right now, and many feel in danger of expressing themselves, especially members of the LGTBQ+ community. I understand if you feel the need to return to or remain in the closet to protect yourself. Just know that I and many others will still be here to vocally and visually support you. And I don’t mean in a “wear blue bracelet to show support for Black women” performative way. I mean in an “I am going to adamantly shut down racist, sexist, homophobic, transphobic, or other bigoted behavior immediately and directly” way. I’ll shame any asshole who feels comfortable being a bigot in my presence.
I acknowledge what privileges I have as a white, cis-gendered, heterosexual woman, and I will use that privilege to protect others however I can. My solidarity is not silent. I will fight for people’s rights to exist, express themselves, and be safe.
Take my silliness, style, individuality, and open solidarity for others from my cold, dead hands. Your fight is my fight until my final breath.
Give my neighbors liberty, or give me death.
What’s Next?
I always write a lot (I think I am an essayist at heart), so thanks if you made it this far. I understand that all this is a lot to take in. You don’t have to do everything right now or all at once. We have time, but be aware that the clock is ticking nonetheless.
Take the time you need to rest and grieve your losses in this election. Sit with the sadness and anger; when you’re ready, mold those emotions into action.
Take your despair, disgust, and rage about what is happening and the threats we face, and turn that energy outwards into building a solid community foundation right now. If you want support from your communities, you must do the work to support them in return. Start small, and start now.
This is an opportunity to create, learn, and grow as individuals, as a community, as a country, and as a people.
I don’t know what the future holds. But whatever comes, remember, in the end, it will be okay. You will be okay. We will be okay as long as we stand together and support one another. It won’t be easy, but the things worth fighting for are never easy. It’s time to roll up our sleeves and fight like our lives depend on it – because they do, and they always have.
We have work to do, beloveds. Let’s get to it together. <3
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